Into The White
by forsaken x
Summary: The entirety of Harry and Draco's relationship is obliviated from Draco's memory. EWE. Harry/Draco. WIP.
1. Prologue

"_We call it white because we need a word, but its true name is nothing. Black is the absence of light, but white is the absence of memory, the color of can't remember."  
_-Stephen King

**Prologue**

Harry sat on the edge of his bed, turning a small ring in his hands. It was simple; just a silver band without any stones, but on the inside there was an engravement which read, _"Semper Tuus – Harry"_ in small, elegant script. It was Latin, meaning _"Always Yours." _Harry actually didn't know any Latin aside from a few phrases, but Draco was fluent in the language, having learned it as a child, and seemed rather fond of it. Once, Draco had told Harry that he should learn to speak another language because it wouldn't kill him to be more cultured. They were sitting on the sofa next to the fireplace, each of them reading a book. Harry had retorted that he could speak Parseltongue and Draco had laughed and said that it shouldn't count because Harry didn't _learn_ it. Harry had murmured something about how he'd like to see Draco _learn_ Parseltongue, but Draco had only smiled before leaning closer to Harry and kissing his neck. "I do rather like it when you speak Parseltongue," he had whispered against Harry's skin before he was dragging his lips down to his collarbone, and Harry had lost all interest in his copy of _My Life as a Muggle_, which he let drop to the floor where it would stay until the next morning. Harry smiled to himself while remembering that evening as he twirled the ring between his fingers. Friday, when they returned home from Draco's favourite restaurant, after nearly three years together, Harry would finally ask Draco to marry him.

What started out as Harry helping Draco, at Narcissa's request, by getting him work with the Auror Department brewing potions right after the war, quickly evolved into a friendship that none of Harry's friends quite understood. After it became evident that he and Ginny were not going to get back together, he had spent less time at the Burrow, and more time with Draco. It wasn't until after their first kiss that Harry realized that he had been harbouring feelings for Draco that somehow escalated beyond being platonic. Not long after they began stealing kisses and falling in and out of each other's beds, they came out as a couple to the world. They fought like crazy at first, troubling their friends and leaving them to wonder if their relationship was healthy, but not long after Draco moved in with Harry the fighting stopped for the most part. If Harry ever had any doubts about spending the rest of his life with Draco, they were extinguished a long time ago.

It was getting late in the morning, so Harry put the ring back into its small velvet box and buried it at the bottom of one of his clothes drawers. Draco had already left to go to Diagon Alley for potion ingredients, leaving Harry to take out the ring and think about what exactly he would say when it was time to give it to Draco, which he did every time he was home alone since buying it, even if only for a few minutes. When Harry finally left for work, even though he was going to be late, he couldn't help smiling to himself.

oOo

Draco walked out of the Apothecary without the Erumpet tails the shopkeeper had assured him would be in that day. It wasn't that Draco was unsympathetic about how difficult they were to acquire, but he was aggravated nonetheless. Erumpets being an endangered species and living only in Africa, along with the recent law that prohibited forcefully taking the tail of an Erumpet, meant that they were only available when someone stumbled upon one that had managed to die without blowing itself up first. He would have to remember to thank Granger for her hand in the Erumpet Protection Act, as if the wretched beast's tails didn't just grow back after being cut off, anyway. Draco did restock on Syrup of Hellebore, which he needed in order to brew a new batch of Volubilis Potion, so the trip wasn't a complete waste of time. Although, if he knew the blasted tails weren't in, he would have attended to the arousal he woke up with at seeing Harry, naked and wet from the shower, searching through the drawers of their wardrobe for something to wear.

"We don't have time," Harry had said. "You have to get to Slug & Jiggers as soon as they open before those tails are sold to someone else. You've been waiting nearly a month for them."

"I can be quick," Draco had said, his lips sliding over the wet skin of Harry's neck.

"The shop will be open in twenty minutes, Draco."

Draco relented, knowing Harry was right, but not before pressing a trail of soft kisses down the back of his neck, whispering against his skin_, "Come home on your lunch break, otherwise I will be forced to wank myself raw thinking about how your arse looked while you were crouching in front of our wardrobe, and by the time your shift is over, I may not still feel the need to fuck you against it."_

Satisfied by Harry's groan that was somewhere between arousal and frustration, he had gotten dressed without showering and, after a quick kiss goodbye, ran down the stairs to the fireplace.

Draco decided to walk to Twilfitt and Tatting's since he now had the rest of the morning to kill. He could even buy something to wear out to dinner that Friday, and maybe something for Harry to wear too, considering he refused to go clothes shopping. He turned down a side-alley, deciding to make his way to the clothing store through the back way and avoid running into anyone; he was deep in pleasant thought and, considering the foul mood he _should_ be in after the let down at the Apothecary, did not want to be interrupted.

Draco didn't even notice the two men following behind him until he was just about to arrive at Twilfitt and Tatting's, but by the time he had realized that the sound of shoe-on-cobblestone had been following him for far too long to be anything but suspicious, the two men already had their wands drawn and ready. Draco glanced behind him, and when he noticed their wands, he spun around, pulling out his own, but not quickly enough to do anything with it.

"_Expelliarmus_!" one of the men shouted, and Draco's wand was ripped from his grasp.

What was it his father had said after Harry disarmed him at the Manor all those years ago?_ "A wizard who can't even keep his wand in his possession is no wizard. I sometimes wonder if you are truly my son, for you are no better than a Squib. Get out of my sight."_

"_Crucio."_

Draco doubled over onto the pavement, arms crossed and clutching at his sides as he spasmed violently under the white-hot pain. Once it subsided he tried to stammer to his feet, but was unsuccessful. He looked up at a long, dramatically curved wand, black with white engraving, which was pointed at him.

"_Obliviate_."

Images were flashing before his eyes at lightning speed and Draco was vaguely aware that it was the last time he would see these memories. Leaning across a table to a spoonful of cake held out for him. His fingers closing around someone's wrist on a Quidditch pitch. Smashing a phial of a botched potion onto the floor out of frustration. Emerald eyes that looked impossibly large behind thick lenses. A brawl with a stranger in the bathroom of the Leaky Cauldron. _"I was there that night on the Astronomy Tower." _Yelling into the wrong end of a telephone while someone's laughter echoed from it. His hands fisted in thick black hair as kisses were being pressed against his chest and stomach. He was reaching out for each of them, but it was like trying to hold onto smoke and one by one they were dissolving between his fingers. He saw Harry rolling over in bed to face him, offering a sleepy smile; it was the first time Harry had told him that he loved him…

"_No, not that one…"_ choked Draco and then everything faded to black and he saw no more.


	2. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

Harry was tearing up the stairs of the main lobby of St. Mungo's with Ron close behind him, struggling to keep up. He was aware of the pounding in his chest, beating hard against his ribs as if his heart was desperately trying to escape, and aware of the thin film of sweat which had accumulated on his brow, but of little else around him. He could hear the blood pounding in his ears, muffling whatever Ron was calling out from behind.

Ron had burst into his office at the Auror Department of the Ministry less than ten minutes before. He had said, _"Malfoy's been attacked. They wouldn't tell me anything except that you'd better get down there."_ While Harry was running up the stairs, the backs of his legs aching, all he could think of was getting to Draco; he needed to see he was okay. When they reached the fourth floor, Spell Damage, Harry had rushed directly to the receptionist desk to ask someone where he could find Draco. Harry didn't need to wait because he could hear Draco from a room at the other end of the corridor. Harry felt a flood of relief course through his body to hear Draco screaming, in obvious outrage. Better him furious than… well, he didn't want to think of that.

"Harry… Wait up, mate," Ron was calling after him, sounding out of breath. The further he got down the hall, the better he could make out what Draco was saying.

"Let go of me!"

"Please Mr. Malfoy… it's only a calming draught. You need to relax so the Healer can-"

"You're telling me to relax? I demand to see a proper Healer immediately! I am running low on patience and when- I said to keep your fucking hands off of me!"

By the time Harry and Ron had finally reached the end of the corridor and turned into Draco's room, the nurse who Draco had been screaming at was cowering near the door. She was thin and small and must have been a few years younger than Harry. Draco had his back turned towards the hospital bed, his hand shakily combing through his hair. The nurse looked beyond relieved to see Harry come in and said, hurriedly and all at once, "Mr. Potter, I'm sorry but the Healer had to see to an emergency on the third floor and Mr. Malfoy was still unconscious when he left and he should be back up by now…"

Ron had finally caught up to Harry and he stood in the doorway, doubled over with his hands braced on his knees while panting. The nurse was still rambling but Harry had stopped listening, he was too startled by the expression on Draco's face when he turned around to face Harry, which was transitioning from fury to shocked-fury. It was merely a few seconds, but time seemed momentarily suspended as Harry watched Draco's eyes widen before reaching for his side at nothing and Harry had the wild thought that Draco had intended grab his wand in order to hex him.

The sudden snap of a gurney being raised in the corridor shifted Harry's train of thought and everything seemed to be moving at a once again normal pace and he rushed forward immediately. "Draco, what happened? Are you hurt?" As Harry reached out to touch his arm, Draco jerked away suddenly and stepped back.

"What the fuck are you doing here, Potter?" he spat. "Did you have something to do with this?" Draco looked back at the nervous nurse who was feebly trying to get Harry's attention by clearing her throat and tapping his shoulder. "Why are you still standing there with that stupid look on your face?" Draco yelled at her. "I told you to get a Healer in here and to get in touch with my father!"

Harry looked behind him to see Ron looking back at him bewilderedly and the nurse looking frightened. "I- I'm sorry," she stammered. "I don't know if I should- I think Healer Bailey should be the one to explain. I've only just started and he said this should be handled delicately, you see, and, well, you know…"

"What's happened to him?" Harry demanded much louder than he had intended to, but his mouth had gone dry and he felt anxiety twisting in his stomach.

The nurse squeaked and jumped back, startled, before looking down at the floor and saying in a voice barely above a whisper, "He's been obliviated."

"_What_?" Harry and Ron asked simultaneously.

The nurse looked back at Harry, and seemed as though she was about to burst into tears at any moment. "He thinks its June of 1998! I've been trying to explain everything to him, but he just keeps _screaming_ at me… calling me names and- and… Oh, I can't _do_ this! I'm going to fetch Healer Bailey and _don't_ you let him leave!"

Harry turned around again and began to move towards Draco, who looked even more confused than Ron. "What does she mean I _think_ its June of 1998? And Potter, if you try to touch me one more time I will hex the bones out of your hands!"

"What's the last thing you remember before being here?" asked Harry, his voice trembling.

"I was in a holding cell at the Ministry awaiting my trial," said Draco, frowning and looking more worried.

"Awaiting trial? But that was in… Oh, fuck."

"What are you on about? Is it not still June?" asked Draco. He struggled to hide it, but Harry could tell he was starting to become scared.

"Er- it's November, actually…" said Harry, neglecting to say it was in fact November of 2001 in fear of Draco going completely mental.

"And what in Merlin's name are you two _doing_ here?"

"You… You don't know?" asked Harry, unnecessarily.

"Know _what_, Potter?" asked Draco irritably.

Harry could only stare at Draco stupidly, trying to wrap his mind around the fact that the past three years were currently missing from his memory, in which case Draco had no idea why Harry would have rushed to his hospital room.

The same realization must have hit Ron at precisely the same moment because he muttered, "Bloody hell," before sliding down into a chair beside the door.

oOo

When Healer Bailey came into the hospital room, Draco demanded that Harry and Ron leave. They waited anxiously in the corridor for twenty minutes. When Ron left to fire-call Hermione, the healer came out to explain to Harry how the owner of Twilfitt and Tatting's had found Draco lying unconscious behind her shop, and that he had been attacked and obliviated. Draco's last memory was being in a holding cell at the Ministry during his trials, which was over three years ago. The healer had given Draco a calming draught and carefully explained to him what happened. He informed him that Lucius Malfoy was serving a life sentence in Azkaban and that his mother was living in New Zealand. He also explained that he was currently working as a potioneer for the Auror Department of the Ministry and had been for the past three years, and that he lived in London. Bailey told Harry that he had listened intently, but asked no further questions, likely due to shock.

Harry felt like his entire world was crumbling around him. He stood, leaning against the wall, holding his head in his hands. "How can you reverse it?" he asked Bailey.

"Memory charms are difficult, Mr. Potter. He is lucky not to have brain damage with such a significant part of his memory erased. There are potions that have been used to assist the recovery of one's memory, but they do not always work. Some people, as I'm sure you know, have used torture as a means to extract memories." At Harry's expression, Bailey quickly added, "Which is, of course, illegal and something a professional healer would never do. We can use Legilimency to try and recover his memories, but I must warn you: it is possible that he will not recover."

"I need to see him," said Harry, pushing off the wall.

"He doesn't want to see you, I'm afraid."

"Did you tell him? Does he know that we're…" Harry trailed off, feeling as though he may lose control over his emotions.

"No, I did not tell him. But we think it would be best if he got some rest and was not given any more potentially stressful news. He can go home, although there is the issue of security…"

"We live together!"

Bailey looked regretful and Harry walked down the corridor, bracing himself. _Potions, Legilimency… Everything will be okay, _thought Harry, but then he heard Healer Bailey's voice echoing in his head. "_It is possible that he will not recover." _Taking a deep breath, Harry pushed open the door to Draco's room.

"I'm not staying here. Give me the potions I'll need tonight and in the morning I will come back. I don't need to…" Draco stopped when he saw Harry standing in his room instead of someone of the hospital staff. "Why are you still here, Potter? Oh, I see… you're an Auror, are you? Well, you can just bugger off and send someone else along because I do not have much confidence in your abilities."

"Draco…" The reality of the situation was hitting Harry hard. Draco _hated_ him, and for the first time in a very long time, Harry felt like crying.

"_What?"_

Harry could see that he was nervous and confused, he did, after all, know Draco better than he knew anyone else. He wanted to comfort him, hold him close, but instead settled on asking, "Are you okay?"

"My father is in Azkaban and my mother is on another continent. I was attacked and I have no memory of the past three years off my life. To top it all off, the only familiar faces I've seen today are yours and the Weasel's. So no, I'm not _okay_. Where did the healer go off to? He said he would write down my address."

"You want to go home?"

"Yes, the healer said I need proper rest. _Why are you looking at me like that?_"

"You lived… Er- that is, you _do_ live… with me," said Harry, quietly and staring down at the floor.

"Excuse me?"

"We live together. We're… We are together."

"What? Oh god, tell me you are not my flat mate."

"You're not my flat mate, Draco. We're _together_. You're my… you're with me."

Draco stared at Harry with his mouth hanging open, before snapping it shut and looking at him angrily. "Very funny, Potter, but I am in no mood for your bloody games. I was just _attacked_, if you've forgotten."

"I'm not joking!" said Harry. "It's true! We've been together for three years, since after I helped you get your job in the Auror Department…"

"Shut up!" shouted Draco. "You're lying."

"We told everyone at the Ministry Gala in January of 1999. You moved in with me that August."

"Shut up. Shut up."

Harry knew that he shouldn't be telling him everything at once, the healer had been right about the stress but Harry couldn't stop himself.

"We go out to dinner on Fridays and you always cook on Sundays. We spend a lot of time at your Aunt Andromeda's house, mostly to visit with Teddy, who is your cousin and my godson."

"_No._ I hate you."

Then Harry did feel tears stinging his eyes, and he knew he should stop. It was too much for Draco, but he couldn't stop talking. "No you don't. You love me and I love you and just this morning you said-"

Draco punched Harry in the mouth with surprising force, causing Harry to stumble back and hit the wall, knocking off his glasses. Harry tasted blood while he watched the blurred figure of Draco fling open the door and storm out of the room.


End file.
